keskiviikko 23. lokakuuta 2019

I stick my stick into the soil and twist it and that's the game for the child I am today watch the hole grow

browser history it all went downhill skiing again after I visited my spam folder

TRIGGER WARNING
may include the good and righteous
and by ball I mean the chain of my existence

Dreaming mode on, just with eyes open... Life's not fair -lessoning
mad world? The thing with -ing is that after I use it once, all the laughing and enjoying words follow like I can't stop using it, feels liek a ing-ism

Well. Words are tough. Clinical sometimes describing me like having "importance of experience" OR "autistic logic" uh... well well it's true I dunt lie but something died in my mouth that a lip balm can't fix.

I was thinking of expanding to another blog with a new domain, new content in this language but  it's not relevant!!!

killing my time and keyboard is just perfect for my nails to be scratched on the corners of gently

it's dark and late and I don't want to wake up tomorrow. I have no regrets. My throat hurts though?
Made spaghetti and meatballs... in the spaghetti packaging was meat from another product or at least it looked like a piece of these barbecue meats... spaghetti was old (best-before in September) and I cooked it in a pan that had burnt, when I had made chocolate semolina porridge... therefore the water was "spiced"
not sure what to do with rest of the brown sauce packets. Basically I mostly have just condiments, sauces and spices, tea and coffee, flour, margarine. Tomorrow starting a diet which allows me to eat apples on top of the products or programme Imma follow... hopefully have energy enough to care for the loan puppers a couple of nights.

Dunnoes such long paragraphs and I only ever got in trouble with just one long ass sentence I used to describe my random naive situation in life of aloneness and personality changes and whatever other's assumptions were that didn't meet reality or how I percieved my success on the outside (Except for my acne skin, yet another blind spot nobody saw and I thought as my only illness)

Read it out loud to me. Occupy your printers if I care most of the time I'm the only one who understands and mostly your symptoms are just same as mine but I was the trendsetter and original thinker, enthusiast whatever bottomless well you'd definately go around to avoid if you'd just know...

fuck I don't even think stigma to be a xstianity related word I just think of it these days as... opposed to my mental health in which case people would be all disgraced by me when I'm in their presence

(when actually I'm quite loving, have a big heart, the builder-type everyone has to either like or feel greatful to be around with)

but whichever lie bound Jesus to his cross haha he never was a profet on his own land either... maybe xstianity was clever or smart but it was written 2000 years ago and now on internet era COME ON!

Besides doctors hated me and I hated them back. What was I doing there for? Someone order a diagnosis? How rude actually. Pop pills, get fucked up, lose your sense of having privacy, bars on the windows bringing you a forced sense of security. YEAH

I'm into this shit like could I sound more pathetic/ironic/irate/naive/morbid anymore


,with a lot of love and wishes you'd catch from falling of the leaves
screams carried by the wind, carried out plans, sets in motion

AHHH
wherever the road takes me starting a new blogging adventure well don't I owe it

Ei kommentteja:

Lähetä kommentti

Kiitos että ajattelit kirjoitustani ja ajattelit jättää kommenttia, mutta pidäthän tyylisi positiivisena ja asiallisena ja kiinnität huomiota oikeinkirjoitukseen, kiitos!

vanhat