At least roads are paved with snow and not good intentions

 On a liquid diet, jaffa and mulled wine. Food sucks. Trying to avoid cooking so I'm not putting anything in my mouth. I had a shower earlier. The whole idea of eating is disgusting. Must be this depression. I can be anorexic for a day even though my weight does not indicate such.

Missed going to the graves. I was on the sofa still resting my eyes. I want to watch the Independence Day things on television even though there is no party, they're just showing old parties and whatnot.

8 years ago my flat was as cold as it is now. I might need mittens to type.

I wish I was elsewhere. I wish I knew how to make Christmas pudding and mince pies. At least those would have a bit of flavor. I miss British snacks and Yorkshire pudding and dumplings and peas and... I dunno... just trying to think of something I'd eat. Rice pudding. Pretend my french fries were grown on that soil lol and my milk in the chocolate was from British cows. It is a bit too much to be thinking. I guess I fell asleep thinking about my London trip of 2006 and the visits thereafter. It was just a year and it'se been years since I had the food but I was thin?

I'm not doing anything to get thinner again, just maintaining. I don't walk, I don't exercise, I don't lift weights. I'm getting anxious just thinking about it.

https://www.k-ruoka.fi/reseptit/mince-pies---brittilaiset-hedelmapiiraset

https://kotiliesi.fi/resepti/christmas-pudding-eli-liekitetty-brittilainen-joulukakku/

^

there you go, recipes. 1-4 hours might take. Too bad I did not save orange peels I could have sugared those for later.. it's just I don't have any raisins, or alcohol, I have the spices and I'd have to buy the dough maybe 

https://yhteishyva.fi/reseptit/murotaikina-makeille-piiraille/recipe-1858

or make it myself... it's all too hard I'm starving and do not want to go buy the ingredients.