Spilling my beans to rinse

 I have too much beans and no inspiration. Made some penne pasta and oregano tomato sauce. It was a pretty bland snack. I also tried drinking coffee, but I don't like it. I woke up from a strange dream but it was funny. Maybe watching the Finnish Top Gear last night inspired it. Anything with Ismo is funny, except his sexist jokes so in my dream he hadn't ejaculated for three months and they were testing him for it.. lols

It's Sunday. I should be having a day off from blogging. New developments have risen though of which I can't start to explain about, because at it's rudimentary, my English isn't so good. It's about sugardaddies really and how I'd rather have one. But I can't have fuckall.

Ok, I'm getting a deja vu from just writing this. There was one a week ago though that felt insanely familiar just walking from my room to the another and it was so familiar I felt uneasily dizzy almost it hurt in my stomach. Strain from strenuous something... A stress maybe. I haven't gotten a new flare up from my hs after I broke up my relationship to my dom on Tuesday, but I guess we still chatted after that just not as much as I hoped ever. I mean, I have so many thoughts about it. He thinks I'm a bully, but I do consider even his side so I don't push, I'm not some Taurus. Actually our love horoscope on different areas on life came 1/5 for me on the sex area. It has haunted me since. Such an important area. Even for someone asexual for twenty years. I was just thinking that it's been 20 years from when I was an exhange student on Isle of Wight. The kids that go there nowadays are mostly Asian or look younger than I ever could at 16-17, unless you look at their fashion statements of like not wearing pants just an oversized sweater. I would've been cold with that in London weather-

 Umm. What else. I don't think English is a cool language. I can affirmatively say that after finally mastering enough of it for my age? My vocabulary is good, my grammar isn't, I feel like I know how it's pronuanciated, or written and I know the rhythm almost and I can spot mistakes, but most importantly I recognize words fast. So what if I write intrinsic and not transient. It's just me practising.

alrighttersson then, do ya mind? Do ya really really mind? Leaving me alone.