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tiistai 5. heinäkuuta 2022

"You have a lot of stuff."

 Finally my Georgian friend came over. They told me the same things as over on messenger. I asked them to bring me kitchen towels and kombucha. They didn't accept my wrinkled two, 5 eur bills though. We drank the "juice" and they showed me some series them likes. I connected my tv to my laptop and we watched one episode and some trailers. Then we hugged and they went back their life them called depressing. I was eating chips & chocolate, and drinking pepsi max too and we were smoking on my balcony. They promised to cook when they came over again. I don't know yet if they are even staying over. Last time they found an alternative in the woods somewhere. I think my loft would still be a lot more comfortable... it's quiet as well. I noticed their hair and it was pretty short. I remember a different version of the person, not so boyish at all.

Not to make myself unavailable, they says. I very much would be pleased if I get some company. I enjoy the presence of others in my living area! I'm unlike a hamster, who is reclusive and only comes out at night. The lenght and size of my hamster always surprised everyone too. She is fat, but like maybe proportionally fuzzy?

We did speak English. I'm always looking for words to use, as is the curse of being so bilingual but I do try to explain words in an another word as well, like peckish if I can't at that moment say peckish correcty I'll go meaning hungry. Particularly when my peckish hamster woke up to pee and stuff her pouches with treats I left yesterday.

I think I was pretty energetic today even if I hadn't washed my toilet bowl or did dishes or cleaned the floors for a few days. I wore a crop top and shorts too cause I didn't bother to put on anything formally proper. It did get a bit chilly so I've put on cozy pants now.

Told her I do wash carpets/mats in my washing machine, but just because if they're small and started to smell like feet. I know what your not supposed to wash. Haha.

They are curious about the plants they given me. Their flowering plant had just withered but was making a new flower. The one I was given by them- I don't know. While we watched that one episode, I didn't even feel them stare though every time I turned, there they were amused and looking at me.

Well, the sun is setting now. I woke up 3pm by which time I'd eaten two bananas. Going to the store and ordering menthol stuff for cigarettes has probably bankrupted me for the day. I made tortillas with chicken strips and hot salsa and grated cheese on my sofa table. It did fill me up though not a warm meal.

I have stuff, but I've downgraded a lot and I like to keep my clutter visible too so there's that. Doesn't cause anxiety for me. I have about 115 pencils and pens for example. I keep pads of lettering paper to write to pen pals. I keep letters, postcards, stickers, notebooks, print-outs... so that category is the hardest to let go.

My paintings I have quit making. I could only concentrate for an hour on a painting anyway. I compared my home to the puzzle they'd completed. Was there this or that piece missing? Nope. Everything was perfectly there.

But yeah, maybe in some other universe there's a recreation of me who isn't so fortunate.

Edit: pronouns!!! I can't believe how many hundreds of times I had to edit this post, I swear!!! I'm just blind or somebody keeps changing them back to their liking lol