Nukuin puoli kymmeneen. Sitä edellisenä yönä en nukkunut. Liikaa kofeiinia ym. Otin vielä tirsatkin päivällä sohvalla.
Mutta nyt ruokaa!
"Blogiasi lukiessamme alkaa aina itkettää!!! Hyväsydämmisyytesi!! <33"Ai itkettää, koska olen niin tylsä ja täyty haukotella? Mulle tulee ainakin "itku" kun haukottelen. Mun omat videot alkaa ainakin itkettää minuakin. Tai no suurin osa, ja lähinnä koska ne oli niin ajankohtaisia.
Answer: Mental illness can go from severe to mild symptoms. Shrinks are closeminded, they don't know you, they won't believe your version of what is truth, you hate them but they write a depressing diagnosis of you because that is what they do. Then shockingly you have some terminal "illness" which people don't know is just a syndrome. Recovering... is another word for: well executed rehabilitation, or a long history of "doing fine" on your own, no one really judging your choices anymore.
I borrowed as much schizophrenia books from the library once as much I could carry. I picked one up, read about visual hallusinations and started to cry. I've never experienced anything like that, so why am I labeled to be in this 1% group of people? So, unfair. We aren't treated as people but leeches to society. We are on a small benefit from the system. Chances of job are slim, our babies taken away. We are so addicted to drugs and treatment from health care that this seems normal to us- we are brainwashed. My grandma named her disease to me in a letter, dancing illness or "skepsis" her letters were confused, crazy, didn't make much sense. Is that the way people perceive my writings? (I don't write in all capital letters though).
Connections in our brains are twisted, they say. I always wanted to rely on my own brain activity. Everyone has a psyche. It just is so insensitive how "we" are treated, stigmatised. If that don't make me angry, mad and just sleep all day, I bet the drugs will. Involuntary injections for 6 years now. Side effects make me fat. Affect my hormones, white matter, IQ, everything that is me. I don't have a life and as a schizophrenic we tend to finish ourselves off in the short run. Psycho's don't kill other people. They do it to themselves.